*8/15/16: To the members of the 'ireddit/Tumblrinaction' community: This particular blog deals in and with the edicts and tenets of Black Nationalism. It is not intended for a mainstream audience. What I suggest, if you've come to this post or blog from that particular site, is that you first read the other page of this blog titled, 'More about me and this blog'. There, you can read this forum's manifesto/mission statement. Then, you can better decide if you'd like to venture further here.
And for future reference, I don't know how the 'ireddit/Tumblrinaction' forum works, but before anyone there posts any author's work, you should at least give them some notice that you intend to do so. This way, at least the author has some say on whether or not their work has a chance at being fairly represented. I had no idea my post was going to be published on that site.
Lastly, I'd like to say to anyone reading this post, that I am not making a reference to any other type of woman, except overweight/fat white women, in regards to how they treat or mistreat Black men.
- MontUHURU Mimia
Conscious, consistently employed and virtuous Black men have a real dilemma when it comes to choosing a mate.
You see, america's white fascist social order has almost completely conditioned black women to dislike Black men. The converse is true as well, as more and more Black men date outside of their ethnic group; we too have been taught to despise black women.
Problem is, some Black men have sought out the company of fat white women as an antidote to dealing with the bad attitudes of some black women.
The other problem is, Black men have been conditioned to believe white women, universally, are going to treat them better than any black woman ever will.
But nothing could be farther from the truth...ESPECIALLY regarding fat white women.
So in case no one's given you a heads up Black man; let me give you the skinny on 3 reasons why dating one of these milk colored monsters could have you wishing you'd stayed loyal to your own kind.
Reason#3: Not only are fat white women overweight, they're also oversexed.
Let's keep it real for a sec'.
Black men...and american men period, have been taught that the white woman is every man's ultimate treasure. We've been taught since birth that this woman is THE standard of beauty ALL women are to be measured by.
Problem is, fat white woman are pariahs to the 'classic' european culture's notion of what is beautiful. And these women know this.
And even though they won't relate this to Black men, or pretty much of anyone else, they know their own men want nothing to do with them. So they carry around a deep sense of shame and a low esteem that causes them to be a bit quicker to jump between the sheets with men who want to be intimate with them.
I want to add, there are always exceptions to this rule, but they're few and far between.
Not only this, but they know that asian and spanish men will feel the same way about them because these men have a 'non-white' complex. So they're gonna' go out of their way to show europeans that they can be more 'european' than them.
And this makes fat white women even MORE desperate to be loved, or at least shown some affection by a member of the opposite sex.
And the easiest man they feel they can get...is a Black one.
Reason#2: When it comes to Black men, fat white women are just as bitter, abrasive, contentious and condescending as those black women you're trying to avoid...if not more so.
Like I mentioned previously, fat white women have a complex about how much they don't measure up to their own man's standard of beauty. So when they date a Black man, they're going to let him know in every way that they're just settling for being with you.
When you're really the one settling for being with them.
They feel that Black men's standards are so low, that if they're with one, they must be at a lowly place in america's social order themselves. And when any woman feels marginalized by dating you, in some way, subtle or not, she's gonna' let you know it.
They figure we should be grateful to be in the company of ANY white woman as they consume copious amounts of cake and ice cream. And whilst their wheezing to catch their breath after that second bacon cheeseburger, they're gonna' make you feel like less of a man 'cause you put up with their thunder thighs and cantankerous attitude.
They are NOT going to show you, a Black man, the sweeter sides of themselves. They're gonna' throw you plenty of sass and lob mean-spirited jokes at you whenever they get the chance. ESPECIALLY if you show them you really care.
Reason#1: And THE number one reason why Black men shouldn't date fat white women is: she won't tell you this...but secretly, she hates you; because you remind her everyday that she can't be with her most valued prize...the WHITE MAN.
I've heard fat white women say that spanish and white men won't kiss them or hold their hands, but Black men will. And even though this should make Black men more endeared to fat white women, it doesn't.
Actually, it makes them HATE YOU MORE.
A woman's ultimate want is SECURITY; and in every woman's mind, nothing is more secure than a white man. And white women feel it's their birthright to have one.
So when fat white women find themselves locked out of that ideal, it drives them a bit crazy. And it drives them to be madder at you. Because in the eyes of every woman, whether they admit it or not, or whether it's the truth or not, Black men offer them NO security. Not unless you've got a million dollars.
I've seen YouTube videos of fat white women who date Black men exclusively, and they talk about Black men like they're dogs. I remember one young fat white woman was telling YouTubers how Black men mooch off her friends and how they're completely unscrupulous...AND SHE WAS DATING ONE!
Fortunately, a good brotha told her the reason she dates Black men is because she's fat; he also told her if she'd lose weight then the white dating pool will open up to her. Right after, the good brotha explained how he wasn't interested in dating white women whether they were fat or skinny. Righteous.
So if you're a Black man who's peeved at black women for their attitudes, and you're thinking about going 'over the hill' and outside your ethnic group, understand that in the case of fat white women...THE GRASS AIN'T GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE!
And the next time you see one of these corn-fed looking types and are interested in talking to them, or if one strikes up a conversation and starts flirting with you, remember, you may wind up receiving some fast sex, but if you endeavor to be in a relationship with one of these women, the only one getting screwed will be YOU!
Again, the moral of this story is: if you're not gonna' put up with a black woman's attitude, don't put up with a fat white woman's attitude either.
Black men, stop selling yourselves short. You deserve better than to date and mate with one of these triple-sized tramps.
Hotep,
MontUHURU Mimia
ANY Interracial relationship where children are involved.... is bad for two reasons, #2: The kid suffers from all the other kids making fun of them being mixed, and #1: each child represents two races being killed
ReplyDeleteMy main reason for writing this post is to give Black men a 'heads up' about what fat white women really think about Black men and how they really feel about them.
DeleteThey treat us like garbage and too many of us take their abuse just 'cause they're white and we've bought into the lie that ANY white woman will treat us better than any Black woman.
So before Black men even get to the point of having children, I want them to stop and really think about whether they want to really put themselves through the hells of being with a fat white woman.
Lastly, as far as 'two races being killed' when an inter-ethnic couple copulates and produces a child; I ONLY CARE ABOUT HOW THIS AFFECTS BLACK PEOPLE!
That's my only concern, 'cause we're the ones who are really losing out; we have the dominant genetics, not whites, so when white people talk about 'race purity', they're too dumb to realize that they're the ones who are spoiling our people's genetics, not the other way around.
Again, we (Black people) can create any kind of person (white, asian, spanish) but none of them can create one of us...so it's Black people who should worry most about keeping our blood lines pure and untainted by the recessive traited, blue-eyed degenerates we know as white people.
Thanks for commenting!
Lol at you capitalizing black and not capitalizing asian, white or hispanic.
DeleteYou still live in the 40's or something? No one cares anymore about mixed race children. My entire family is giant mixed race and I grew up around mostly white people and no one ever said a work or cared. I didnt know what racisms was until it was taught to me in school that white poeple were different and then my freinds white and black all started looking at each other differently.
DeleteTell me if you feel the same way after you're out of school and in the workforce for a decade.
DeleteAnd the reason I capitalize the word Black, is because Black men and women can create every other kind of person while none of them can create one of us; we have the dominate genetics.
DeleteAnd if ya' don't know...ya' better ask somebody.
You seem to be very racist. You have a blog full of hate and degrading every race accept your own. As a white woman who is married to a black man and has been for 20 years now I just want you to know your facts are screwed up. Because I have three beautify children with my husband and love him dearly. The whole sex thing you posted is bullshit. Ive only been with BLACK husband. I love him and he loves me. You BLEED RED just like me the WHITE woman.
DeleteWhy do you say every woman sees security in a white man? Your average serial killer and child molester is a white man. Why would I do that? I attempted it once before because I was told there was something better about them. Lasted a minute and I will not try it again. I was raised poor and never really had money until my adult years. So money wouldn't make me feel secure. Had the opportunity to be with men who had money, and dumped them for whatever reason. I can pay my own bills and have gone broke in the past trying to be superwoman for some needy dude. So.... :) no thanks. I don't agree. And why do you feel the need to make such a sweeping generalization? Everybody's different, no?
ReplyDeleteSeveral women's surveys have determined that the most desirable type of man across the board to every ethnic group of women is a white man; and DON'T take my word for this...go look this fact up!
DeleteAnd I agree the white man is the most likely to have predilections towards pedophilia and serial killing, but the fact remains that white men have more resources and more access to resources than every other type of man...this makes him the most secure choice to women.
Even you admit to dating a white guy behind someone telling you there was something 'BETTER ABOUT THEM'.
I also understand you can pay your own bills, but to the overwhelming majority of women AND men, money equals security; that's just the way it is.
Beyond this, Black people especially are so conditioned to love white people and hate themselves, is it any wonder why we obsessively pursue relationships or just outright trysts with pale skinned folks?
Take the example of Tommy Sotomayor for instance; the overwhelming majority of Black people will agree that he's basically a white supremacist in Black face...but I know for a fact that the majority of those same people STILL LISTEN TO TOMMY SOTOMAYOR'S VIDEOS.
And, the fact that he's a bit of a celebrity, i.e. has the white supremacists stamp of approval, makes him more attractive.
Quite as it's kept, white supremacy is seductive, 'cause we (Black people) have been so conditioned to respond favorably to it, that when we hear its message coming from one of our people, we rarely question their motives.
And, as far as making sweeping generalizations go, don't you think white people, and white men more specifically, do that to the Black Diaspora every day?
You say everyone's different, that's not true, 'cause especially in the case of white people, no matter how liberal they are, they'll always think that they're intrinsically smarter and more morally upstanding than any Black person.
I'm sure you've encountered a white person who you thought was super cool and 'down' with Black culture, and as soon as they get too comfortable, they show their true colors (pun intended). They may be 'in' our culture, but they'll never be truly 'of' our culture because of their superiority complex.
How reliable are these surveys you speak of? I would think, with the mindset you have, that you would not base what you believe is fact on a survey which is highly likely to have a biased sampling? What corporation or organization conducted that survey with what agenda?
DeleteAnd as far as sweeping generalization go, I'm going to have to quote Sotomayor from one of only 3 videos I fast forwarded through out of disbelief before I started to feel nauseous (learned my lesson about that very quickly), why would you compare yourself with white people in doing something that isn't right to begin with? They aren't the standard for justification of your actions.
Also, part of the reason I am where I am career-wise is because my previous, white manager recognized skills I have that could be better used in a position that pays more and has more responsibility. The woman who made the investments in her that lead to where she is now, is a well-known black figure in education. And there's nothing about her as an individual that resembles black culture, if that's what you assume. She even enthusiastically rallies behind the new, innovative ideas of our fairly new director, who also is black. So, of course you won't agree, but it is not a fact that all white people think they're smarter or better than black people. That, too, is a generalization that discredits your message in my view. I read your piece on Michelle Rhee and felt enlightened, having never heard of that situation prior. But when you promote your opinions and ill-feelings toward any group (whites, single mothers, etc.), it decreases the impact of the factual information you share. I have the urge to brush you off as another angry black person, but I'm too hungry for the education to do so. But may maybe you'd be more effective just sticking to the facts. My opinion.
Okay, here's the pedigree of one of the surveys I got this info. from; a study called 'Racial preferences in dating' which was a joint survey conducted between Columbia, Stanford and Chicago universities. And this study came up with data that conclusively states how the majority of american women are attracted to white men based on their 'earning capacities'.
DeleteAnd if you'd like to look at this study, google 'Racial Preferences in dating' -- Columbia University, and you can download the PDF with all its findings.
But beyond this, I've seen every ethnic group of Black and brown woman fawn over white men my whole life, because of their 'potential' earning capacities; and some women won't even take this into consideration, they just wanna' date a white guy to be a hit with their Black and brown woman friends. Even you stated you dated a white guy because someone told YOU there was something BETTER ABOUT THEM; and Black men fawn over white women the same way because both Black men AND women have been conditioned to love white people more than their own kind.
Now, in regards to my 'sweeping generalizations', I can't believe you actually quoted TOMMY SOTOMAYOR. My first encounter with you was predicated on the fact that you thought I was okay with Uncle Tommy doggin ' out sistas, but when Uncle Tom started in on the brothas, I had a problem. But here's why I make sweeping generalizations about whitey, it's because year after year, I see him and his kind commiting the greatest atrocities against my kind every day of his life. Hurricane Katrina (those levees were bombed by whites), Sean Bell in NYC, Trayvon Martin, Rodney King, etc. AND what Uncle Tom is failing to realize is these inbreds have the institutional might to carry out all their dastardly deeds towards us, while we don't wield the same kind of power to affect their lives.
And I'm glad your white manager thought your skills were outstanding enough to invest in you, give you more responsibility and give you the chance to make you more money; 'cause the skills your using in that capacity serves to keep whites in control of this country's resources. Yes white people are gonna' promote and exalt your status when your good at what you do and you're WORKING FOR THEM. Now, if you were working for a Black owned company that rivaled theirs, and your skills were serving your people, you'd definitely see the change int their attitudes.
And they got those resources on the backs of our ancestors, so understand why they can give so freely, it's because they live in abundance behind their wicked actions towards us.
Now, am I telling you and every Black person working for them to quit their jobs...no; I'm saying that in addition to making them rich, we need to pool our resources and work more for ourselves than them.
And when you say not every white person thinks they're smarter than Black people, it tells me you don't spend much time with white people away from work. You have to catch them in a more relaxed environment for them to show their true colors (pun intended). Also, I can't tell you how many white musicians, actors and entertainers I've had to stop listening to or watching becuase they've revealed themselves as thinking they're smarter and more mannerly than Black people, beneath their liberal facades.
And I see this on a continual basis. And some of us are so conditioned to love them, that even when we see this, we don't or won't recognize it for what it is...the superiority complex of white people.
Even though I find many of the subpoints of this article disagreeable from my perspective, I agree somewhat with it's thesis:
ReplyDeleteDon't settle. Don't take abusive. You and your love are precious.
If you date a corn-fed white woman, do it because you think she's beautiful, because when she's with you she makes you feel clever, handsome, and funny. Do it because she's so sweet and loving that you get a smile just thinking about her. And stay with her because she encourages you to be the best person you can, financially, intellectually, and morally. Never settle. And white girls? All that applies to you too.
-Signed
Corn-Fed White Girl Happily Married Interracial Relationship ( 5 years )
First off, you're probably married to a spanish or asian man.
DeleteSecondly, if you ARE married to a Black man, I know full well that if you were at your perfect weight, you wouldn't be.
From the wise words of Morgan Freeman: How do we stop racism? Stop talking about it. Good day.
ReplyDeleteAnd from the wiser words of my ingenious ancestor Malcolm X: "When your people stop being violent towards my people, I'll tell my people to put away their guns..."
DeleteHave a good life.
Sumeria. KMT. Xia. Shang. Cush. Axum. Numidia. Carthage. Israel. Monomutapa. Mali. Songhai. Ghana. Dahomey. Benin. Zulu. Tanganyika. Arabia Felix (Yemen). These are but a FEW GREAT BLACK empires throughout Africa and the WORLD, without the interference of 'you people' before you even a BLIP on the radar. We don't need you, we never have. In fact, its been quite the contrary, you have always needed US:
Deleteour melanin - you guys are mutated Black Dravidian albinos. No insults, just anthropological FACTS.
our intellect - the foundation of Hellenic Greek civilization is built on the foundation of KMT which well pre-dates it
our resources - Africa, the garden of Eden, cradle of all mankind, which has been plundered since the johnny-come-latelys of the world (you) entered the world stage after the renaissance. Black-skinned peoples the world over long invented farming and technology (Natufians), built pyramids and stonehenge (sorry, white people are not indigenous to Europe, look it up, lol) practiced the world's oldest worship systems (Cushites) and introduced and preserved some of the world's greatest religions (Hebrews). Yes, the ancient Hebrews lived right next to the great continent, they were Black then, and are Black today, the people in that land are "Israelis", they don't call themselves HEBREWS for a reason.
So you see, we don't NEED YOU. Never have.
Botswana is just one of many modern sovereign Black nations doing just fine without you meddling little devils. Same for Bahamas. Next time you diss Detroit, think (if you can, critically) of Prince George County in Maryland, or Ladera Heights and Baldwin Hills in California, some of the wealthiest and most affluent Black communities in this country. Now take THAT and shove it up your crack pipe.
Yes..Real Talk..We built & keep building amerikkka..TY 4 telling it like it is Bless U.
DeleteI totally agree with this article. Thank you. I will show this to my son.
ReplyDeleteWOW!
DeleteThat statement is beyond a compliment; THAT RIGHT THERE IS WHAT IT'S ALL ABOUT; PASSING THIS INFORMATION ON TO THE BLACK DIASPORA'S YOUNGER GENERATION SO THEY DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES WE DID!
This statement gives me the incentive to be TWICE AS PRODUCTIVE!
YOU MADE MY WEEK WITH THIS COMMENT!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING THAT; AND YOU AND YOUR SON/SUN BE BLESSED KING!
KEM WESIR! (Meaning Black Power in our ancestor's ancient language the 'Medu Netcher')
I love how it's only your broad generalizations that are the right ones.
ReplyDeleteLet's keep it real...whites aren't gonna' admit they're this lowly even if they know they are. So if you're white, what stake do you have in telling the truth?
DeleteDo you even know what the truth is outside of what you're people tell you is true?
What stake do you have in lying or bullshitting? A lot it seems. Were you left by a black man who went with a white woman? Seems to be a lot of psychological angst and hate going on here. Do you want to talk about yourself and your own inner feelings rather than attacking others for your insecurities? It's a shame when people delve so low, we're here to help.
DeleteFirstly, I'm a BLACK MAN!
DeleteSecond, whatever kind of anglophile you are (Black, white, asian, etc.) means that you don't have the capacity to understand what this post is talking about. Or maybe being a white person, you're just reluctant to acknowledge how shallow and bigoted your people are.
So any of the psychological angst your referring to, is coming from you and/or your people.
And might I add, no one sinks lower than whitey.
And if ya' don't know, ya' betta ask somebody!
Wow. This post is about as racist as it can get. If you reverse the black and white terms then there would be hell. But somehow it's okay to lump all big white women into one category?
ReplyDeleteObviously you have issues with fat white women. I really don't care to change your mind.
I'm a big girl. I'm not a huge white girl like in your memes up there but I'm not thin either. My man is an educated, smart, has a job and loving black man. I simply googled around to find out how to love him better & understand him since it's my first time dating a black man and obviously there are differences.
I disappointingly found your article and I am sad people actually feel that way. But I'm not going to give you a hard time about it because there are jerks in my race who feel the same except about their own race.
I decided to be with him not from lack of options but because he is an amazing person. I cannot apologize for that but I can apologize for your racist thoughts and overgeneralizing.
P.S. He's bigger than I am and our income levels are about the same. And before you reply about "Let's see how you feel in x years", the only that matters to me is the here and now and I don't think a distant outsider can accurately predict MY relationship outcome based on color.
DeleteThe truth is I found an amazing connection with this person and he happens to be black. That's it. And I am tempting to gain an understanding (which I have always tried anyway) about what your people face on a day to day basis and through out history. But even if I wasn't with him that would still be important to me.
So talk about your past experiences with fat white women, fine but don't overgeneralize and have some less hate, please.
You say you wanna' apologize for my 'racist' thoughts and overgeneralizing,,,well, when are your people gonna' apologize to my people for your bigoted thoughts and genocidal actions behind those thoughts?
DeleteWhen do we get an apology for all the viruses and emotional and financial plaques your people have visited on my people?
I don't need or want you to apologize for how I feel about your people; I'm not the one making it hard for you and yours to live this life; but your people do everything in their power to act as wickedly towards my people as you can every single day.
You either don't know or don't care to know how your people really treat my people...or how white women really treat Black men. So nothing about your argument moves or makes sense to me.
Tell your people to hate less; 'cause they're the ones indulging their hatreds and lording their feelings over everyone else.
This is one of the best articles I have seen in a long time....I am going to send this to everyone I know with a big fat white lady. They need to be informed.LOL
ReplyDeleteI think the article was excellent. It shines light on a topic nobody wants to discuss or admit to. I would say 70% of the black men I know that are with a white woman are obese and or considered unattractive by society standards.
ReplyDeleteDana...
DeleteI'm also trying to shine a light on why Black men think these women will treat them better than a Black woman will; it's because everyday of our lives, the Black Diaspora is taught to hurt and hate themselves via the programming of european school systems and the media.
I also have another post titled, 'Are you a sex toy for white people?', that speaks to how Black men AND women throw themselves at white, spanish and asian people and how over 60% of us (Black men and women) STILL wind up oversexed and alone in our pursuits of a fair-skinned person to marry.
So I'm hoping this post will give Black men and women some insight as to how much we've been conditioned to hate and hurt one another and how we can recondition ourselves outta' this self-hatred.
Thanks for commenting!
Your site is very interesting, but I have kids and must go to bed. Maybe I will find you again next time I surf. Good luck and take care!
ReplyDelete'fiji'...
ReplyDeleteLet me make this emphatically clear, I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST OVERWEIGHT, OR TO USE THE 'POLITICALLY INCORRECT' TERM 'FAT' PEOPLE!
That's not what this post is about. It's specifically about 'fat white women' and their attitudes towards Black men...period.
I'm also not saying every Black man who is with a white woman is with a 'fat' white woman, I'm saying, this is the perception amongst most americans.
I too have seen a good number of Black men with fit white women, but I've noticed how fat white women flaunt an attitude of being able to have ANY Black man they want. And that's untrue.
I also wanted to relay to Black men who thought this might be an alternative to dealing with some abrasive Black women, that these fat white ones are THE SAME WAY TOWARDS BLACK MEN!
When I was on a dating site, the majority of responses or notices I got were from what I call TRIPLE 'O' WHITE WOMEN, they were either overweight, oversexed, or old...or ALL THREE! And they thought I should be happy they contacted me.
I also saw how some of them addressed Black men, and the fat white women seemed to go out of their way to be crude, belligerent and contentious. But the majority of Black men who wanted to give them a chance didn't know this beforehand.
So, I wanted to give Black men a 'head's up' about these particular women...that's all.
Thanks for commenting!
You do have some valid points in your article, yes there is a measure of desperation and rejection that drives (self imagined unattractive) women of all races to seek out partners where they are available.
ReplyDeleteSome obese white women do go to black men because it is a well known fact based on the large number of single parent families that we are a matriarchal group and tend to treasure women (of all sorts).
I date a FAT white woman we are both gainfully employed with six figure incomes with my salary ~ 30K or so more than hers, I never saw her as fat when we started dating I just liked her and it clicked. I now find I have issues with her weight and I am trying to get her to lose a FEW.
Not all relationships even where body types are disproportionate start out the same. Do I think she wanted me because I was stable attractive and in good shape YES.
Does that mean our relationship will fail ? NO
The quality of our relationship will be based on what we put into it, my now superficial nature of looking at her weight and hers of assessing my value beforehand are part of what makes us human.
We will either grow closer or apart, but that will be based on our inability to continue as a couple due to individual deficiencies and not due to her weight and race nor mine.
I am sure there are some people who think I am with her for one reason or another, however I am fully aware I can have any woman I want and she is the one I desire.
I do not desire her for her complexion nor for her size [which I desire to be a few sizes smaller :~) ]. I desire her for her warm personality, intelligence and fire when we fight about politics religion or grammar, I desire her for more than I could think of and none of it has to be with white or fat.
I would rewrite this article if I were you, not to simply point to fat white women and black men, rather just to state to person to be honest in their choices.
First off, when you say obese white women are attracted to Black men because we are a 'matriarchal' ethnic group, based on the fact that many Black men come from single, female-headed households; you're missing one extremely important point...
DeleteThe reason the Black Diaspora's households are mainly female-headed, is because white supremacists have conditioned us to hate ourselves and each other, and I'm referring to Black men and women; and the reason this was done was so we wouldn't form loving relationships with each other anymore; thus, we have a disproportionate amount of female-headed households. Remember, whitey's always conscious of us being the most able to breed him out of existence, thus, the less of us there are, the better for him.
FEMALE-HEADED HOUSEHOLDS DON'T HAPPEN NATURALLY, THIS WAS A PLAN CONSTRUCTED BY WHITEY TO PURPOSELY BREAK UP THE BLACK NUCLEAR FAMILY.
Secondly, don't you find it odd that the white woman you're in a relationship with sought out a 'fit' Black man instead of a 'fat' one? Why wouldn't she want a man who was more like herself?
This points to your white woman being critical of other people's appearances, even though she wouldn't want anyone being that critical of hers.
Now, understand what this post is NOT SAYING; I'm not saying that I have a bias against overweight or 'fat' women, that's not the primary issue here. I'm also NOT SAYING that the only white women Black men are with are FAT WHITE ONES; I've seen several brothas with slim, attractive white women. So, that is a stereotype.
I'm saying that since you're fat white woman was critical enough of appearances to want to be with a 'fit' Black man, you should understand, that more than likely, she wouldn't be with you if she were at her perfect weight.
Now, the reason I wrote this post was I saw too many fat white women dating Black men and treating them like trash; and no one wanted to speak about it.
Understand, the conditioning Black people get to hate themselves by white supremacists is far and away worse than any other ethnic group in this world gets, it's the reason that there's such a rift between Black men and women today; it's also the reason why Black men think any type of woman will treat them better than a Black woman would. Thus, the reason some of us seek the company of white women in the first place.
Beyond all this, the fact that you want her to lose weight now, says to me, you really preferred to be with a fit woman yourself all along.
Now, understand this, if she does lose the weight, shes not only gonna' change physically, she's gonna' change psychologically. And more than likely, she gonna' look to 'switch up' if a white man comes calling.
Either way, what your comments say to me is, your relationship started off for the wrong reasons, and it's doomed to end for those same reasons.
The tone of your response, is what I would have loved to read as the initial blog. As for relationships that start for the wrong reason, I think I spoke clearly to the fact that it was possible our motivations for being together were not properly aligned and as a result our relationship could fail for this reason and not due singularly to weight/race etc...
ReplyDeleteAre Fat white women and fit black men the only ones who enter into relationships without adequately evaluating the potential for their happiness ? NO!!!!
As such I hold firmly that while your blog seeks to identify a failing in the balance where these relationships are concerned (trust me I share some of the same sentiments), I do not agree on the face of it that some of these scenarios cannot be valid relationships.
The painting of all canvases with the same brush stroke is akin to celebrating all Asians to be smart all blacks to be dumb etc. We are all unique HUMAN BEINGS with traits (both good and bad) that we acquire along the path of life. You reference the subjugation of a race and the clear calculation to remove the patriarch as the visible head and thus weakening the structure of the black family and I agree with you wholeheartedly, however I must state that while I can never forget who I see when I look into the mirror I can also never forget who I am when I bleed or when I breathe.
Let black men date who they want to and make the mistakes they want to, speak to the positives they should try to create in their own lives and maybe less of these stereotypical scenarios will exist. There is a psychological weakness in each human being black or white and until we have the strength to conquer our inadequacies, we will seek to fill them in places where we are celebrated more than criticized.
Let me see some more posts from you speaking to our brothers about how to bring themselves out of this mire of self pity and self degradation, then you will see less of them with "cornfed".
I will leave you with some words from a song from Bob Marley that I love.
Until the philosophy which hold one race superior
And another Inferior, Is finally And permanently Discredited And abandoned ...
That until there no longer First class and second class citizens of any nation
Until the colour of a man's skin Is of no more significance than the colour of his eyes ...
That until the basic human rights Are equally guaranteed to all, Without regard to race...
That until that day The dream of lasting peace, world citizenship Rule of international morality Will remain in but a fleeting illusion to be pursued,
But never attained ...
First off, you need to understand I am a BLACK NATIONALIST, FIRST AND FOREMOST...PERIOD.
DeleteThis means I don't care about the plight of white, spanish or asian people...period. 'Cause they sure as hell don't care about us, and they're all constantly teaming up against us.
That means, I'M DOWN FOR MY PEOPLE EXCLUSIVELY! Now if you wanna' call that xenophobic or bigoted, fine; but this is where I'm coming from.
Second, what I tell my brothas constantly is we have to get rid of the self-hatred that was force fed into us by 17 or 18 years of schooling in the americas; that more than anything will help us to finally work together on common goals, and it'll help us get ahead, behind enemy lines--where we are now.
See, what you're trying to sell me is some 'multi-cultural/post-racial' fantasy that DOESN'T WORK OR APPLY TO REAL LIFE! All that sounds good in theory, until a white cop pulls your Black ass over. And don't take my word for it, ask the parents of Mike Brown.
I don't have time for dreams and fantasies; I'm living in the real world. And I wanted my brothas to know how the overwhelming majority of white women, fat or not, feel about them.
We're taught that any type of woman will treat us better than any Black woman would; and that's just a ball-faced lie!
Now, I'm just offering some facts for brothas to think about, the rest is up to them.
But what I do know is your not gonna' get this info. from a lot of other places; so I wanted to provide brothas with a public service announcement of sorts that gives them a heads up about these milk colored monsters and what they won't tell you to your face.
Remember Martin Luther King's dream was just that...a dream.
It's time we woke the hell up!
So let's wake them up by arming them with the tools to improve their lot in life rather than simply being critical, It is easy enough to say what does not work, how about some solutions on what will work ?
ReplyDeleteAs for your Dr. King I have very little respect for him and his philosophy (training blacks [adults and children] on how to take a beating from police, so they can have peaceful marches).
I will stick with Toussaint L'ouverture, Marcus Garvey Brother Malcolm and James Baldwin etc..
However I think strongly that as we continue to accentuate the differences and promote a separatist society, we limit the ability of the BLACK man to excel. The black man's excellence is not found is isolation nor it is honed in criticism.
You have a forum to do GOOD WORK, do it.
The hatred is strong in all of us and we must shed a tear when we see injustice being meted out to our fellow brother. I choose however to arm and educate my brothers where I can rather than tearing them down. I will also never forget, that beneath the trappings of black, white, red etc we are all (regardless of race) plagued with the frailty that is life and tasked with the burden of making the most of that life.
Do not allow yourself to be so consumed with rage, that ratiocination escapes you. This change you seek to make will come from opening eyes through wisdom, also from embracing that which is different.
I feel within myself, that a strong sense of identity as a HUMAN BEING helps us to deal with all that surrounds us. I've always said to others, in a crisis a man will first look out for the person he sees in the mirror (same ethnicity/race). Notwithstanding that I do not dream of some utopia but rather a world where my brothers will come to realize that they too can have anything they desire in this world and not feel a need to settle.
If you have no confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life. Marcus Garvey
I leave another quote in parting:
A reading man and woman is a ready man and woman, but a writing man and woman is exact.
Marcus Garvey
Let there be exactness in your writing, let there be a clarion call to improve not to isolate, let there be swords given with your shields as you write. When you would call brothers to hold this banner with you, be sure what it is that the banner says and what it is that we stand for.
We do not mete out hatred for hatred and derision for derision, rather we must awaken and enlighten, arm and protect.
Do not chase your warriors away with vitriol, but rather embrace them.
Let them be willing to come sit at your feet and hear of your trials and absorb your teachings.
I would love to meet you for coffee someday somewhere as I see such an admirable passion for the black race in your writing...
Do not lose sight that while the ethnicity is black the race is HUMAN.
Pardon any typos done in haste - in transit...
I find it odd how you say I don't offer any tools to empower young Black men, when I talk, I think ad nauseum sometimes, about how the Black Diaspora's number one priority has to be getting rid of our self-hatred.
DeleteNot only do I say they or we should do this, but I give them pointers on the techniques to do it with through meditation. I'll leave a link for one of my posts where I do this in detail at the end of this comment.
Moreover, if you think I'm tearing down Black men, you're reading the wrong Blog. I do nothing but try to elevate the Black Diaspora and inform them on reasons why they should love being who they are.
Furthermore, I DO NOT HATE ANYONE, LEAST OF ALL WHITE PEOPLE! I just understand the game they're running on our people and I wanna' hip my people as to why we are so predisposed to hurt and hate one another. I mostly want them to know how we've been conditioned to hate ourselves by the lessons we get in the white supremacist school system.
And empowering our people has nothing to do with multi-culturalism or integration. I want the Black Diaspora to know, emphatically, that we DON'T NEED WHITE, ASIAN AND SPANISH PEOPLE. ALL WE GOT AND ALL WE NEED IS US!
See, all that 'we're all one color' stuff sounds good in theory, until a white cop pulls your Black ass over. Then you'll see how liberal white people are or aren't.
Here's the link for the post I was speaking about earlier: http://cinematicsymbolism.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-lowly-nature-of-white-women-part.html
And if you still can't see my point of view, feel free to find another Blog that caters more to yours.
@Anonymous Black Man who is obviously with a white woman:
DeleteWhat makes you think this blogger is trying to 'isolate', 'deride' or 'criticize' Black men? His message was more critical of the WHITE WOMEN who DERIDE THEM! Methinks thou protest too much to points that weren't even raised. All he's doing is bringing attention to this dastardly dysfunctional dynamic.
I understand there's a lot of baggage from white people and we may come off as the bad people but at the same time not all white people are the same just like not all black people are the same no one is the same god made everyone different for a reason but people need to stop putting sterotypes it's getting old I'm a overweight white woman married to a black man and im not with him for any the reasons that you said so isn't that you putting labels and stereotypes.. White people do a lot of harm in general and in my case one molested me from 4 to 9 years old and I grew to dislike and not be attached to white men so to sit there and say all this is fine because you have to a right to an option and that's fine.. But its not true I'm sure there's a lot of cases of it being true I'm sure most positive but at the same time its not true to all fat white woman or white race... I grew up in a home to see no difference of a person but there personalities and cultures to accept everyone for who the are and what they believe in and I do still to this day and I'm gonna teach my kids the same thing because I'm not gonna allow my kids to grow up thinking it's aren't to hate or dislike anyone for any reason.. That's ignorant and ridiculous to waste of time..
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry for what happened to you as a child, no woman deserves that. And you maybe the exception to the white female rule, but understand, the overwhelming majority of overweight white women feel this way and treat Black men accordingly; that's why I wrote this post.
ReplyDeleteI myself have seen overweight white women go out with Black men and call them out of their names while they were doing it. Or they had very abrasive attitudes towards Black men, attitudes they wouldn't dare show a white, latin or asian man.
So I understand your point, but understand mine; if you chose to leave the Black man you're with, you get to enjoy the pale-skinned privileges given to you by white fascists; whether you realize this or not. It goes beyond, we're all the same color beneath our skin and all that idealistic stuff that doesn't hold water in reality.
I'm glad you grew up in a home where color wasn't an issue, but understand, most of your white female peers don't; and they have no problems showing this.
Furthermore, you need to understand, my people, Black men specifically, are being hurt by thinking overweight white women on the whole will treat them better than a Black woman will; and I feel it's my duty to give them the 'straight dope' on how the majority of overweight white women really feel about them.
It's ashamed the majority of your people can't be or aren't like you; but you need to realize, the majority of your people like the status quo 'cause it serves them. So that's what I'm hear to tell me and mines.
Maybe if more white persons like you could speak to your people, we wouldn't have these kinds of problems, but quite frankly, I don't ever see that happening; so I stand completely behind the message of this post. Again, I didn't start this Blog to be popular, I started it to tell the truth. And the truth hurts, but sometimes it needs to.
Heather...
ReplyDeleteOne great thing about this, and every other Blog, is if you don't like what it's saying, you never have to come back.
So long!
Let these men date White and non Black women regardless of whether or not, they are fat, ugly or slim and attractive. I am done with them. Let them seek bliss with the women that they love, desire and prefer to mate with. Besides I prefer to date non Black men and will keep it that way.
ReplyDeleteHowever this was a good article and I respect your views even though I don't agree
Coco...
DeleteI don't know if this is the same 'Coco Sista' that commented on my Kerry Washington post; but if it is, I'm glad to see you back!
Now, the reason I wrote this post, and am writing this Blog quite frankly, is, for years, I've wanted to know what happened to the Black Diaspora. I wanted to understand why the Black 'nuclear' family was more intact in 1920 than it is in 2015; so I set about doing some research.
And what I found is, the aversion Black men and women have to each other, isn't something we're BORN WITH! It's been bred into us by years of conditioning in the american school system specifically, and the american social order in general.
Now, I can empathize when you say you are 'done' with Black men, 'cause I once felt the same way about Black women. But once I found out how every single history book we've been required to read in pre, middle and high school, has been engineered to destroy our esteems and make us hate ourselves; and I'm not even talkin' about the messages we get from movies and TV, I took a second look at my scrutiny of Black women.
Now, the conditioning that Black men and women get to hate themselves and each other, is TEN TIMES WORSE than any other ethnic group gets in this world. This is because, white fascists know we have the most power to breed them out of existence. This is why, they've done and are doing, everything in their power to keep us apart.
AND IT'S WORKING! The white fascist's agenda to keep Black men and women from dating and marrying each other, is working TOO WELL!
Coco...
DeleteBut here's my main point, if Black men and women can understand what's been done to us by these inbreds, then maybe, when can get back to a place of loving each other, or at least being civil towards each other again.
It's ashamed that a Black man and woman with a college degree, will go out of their way to marry anyone, but another Black man and woman. This is how fractured our community's become.
Now, being a Black Nationalist, it pains me to see my people like this. And I'd love to do something to strike a blow at the white fascist agenda to keep us apart...and this is what this Blog represents.
And it's not like just 'cause I can write a post like this, my struggles with my conditioning is over. I meditate everyday to reverse the effects of the white supremacist conditioning that's been force fed into me, and I still have to stop myself from thinking the way I used to.
Ultimately, the question is this: if the perfect Black man or woman were to come into our lives, would we give them a chance? Or would we push them aside in our pursuits of another white man or woman?
Mind you, the way the majority of Black people wind up in their pursuits of white, spanish and asian people to date and marry, is oversexed and alone at fifty, after spending decades being sex toys for these people.
Ultimately, people are gonna' date who they want, I know that; but, if you are a person who's looking at this Blog, maybe there's something in you that really wants to be with a good Black mate. Maybe there's a sliver of desire to be with one of your own kind that won't leave...this is what I'm appealing to in every Black person who ventures here.
Before I leave this life, I'd love to see the rift between Black men and women ended; now, will that happen? I'm hoping it will. But until then, I can't give up on my people. 'Cause whether we know it or not, WE'RE ALL WE GOT!
Black men and women will meet their fate together, regardless of how they feel about each other.
So, I'm hoping we both heed the small voice inside us that's desperate to be with one of our own kind, 'cause no one' gonna' be able to relate to our struggles, or ultimately love us, better than that right person from our own people.
And I hope you can dig we're I'm coming from 'Coco'...'cause I think there's a reason you're looking at this Blog that compels you to hang on to hopes of finding that right Black man. And hopefully, I can hang on to that same hope and find that right Black women as well!
Thanks for commenting!
"Black men and women will meet their fate together, regardless of how they feel about each other."
ReplyDeleteThis here is nothing but the TRUTH!
ThANKHS for the positive comments Queen!
DeleteI see you!
Judging by this, I guess you were asleep during your English classes.
ReplyDeleteSo you can't get a girlfriend and you think the black guys are hogging all the fat white chicks with low self esteem issues? Sorry dude this isn't going to help. Quite sad that you can't even bag a bottom feeder so think removing the competition will help haha. You're gonna be single for life dude.
ReplyDeleteYou can't be rejected by someone you're not interested in.
DeleteSo I could care less about who fat white women date. I wrote this for Black men who are thinking of taking up with one of these women as a cautionary tale of why they should reconsider their choices.
I've seen fat white women talk and act in ways they wouldn't dare try with non-Black men. So this is my message to them.
Now as far as me trying to bag one of these 'bottom feeders', I'm not interested in one of your women whether they're in shape or out. So you can keep your degenerate women whether they're on the bottom, top, or somewhere in between.
'Veronica'...
ReplyDeleteI wanna' make something emphatically clear, I didn't write this in a flash of mean-spiritedness towards any other kind of woman except fat white women, because for years I'd seen their odious attitudes towards Black men exclusively.
I wrote this as a cautionary tale for any brotha who sees these women as an option, 'cause we've all been conditioned to believe white women, no matter what kinda' shape their in, will treat us better than any Black woman will.
But mostly I wanna' show the Black Diaspora that behind our being conditioned to hate ourselves by white fascists, we're always choosing to be abused by any non-Black person, rather than date one of our kind. Now, if this post can stop just one Black man or woman, from being used like a sex toy for the gratification of any non-Black person, then writing this will have been worth it.
ThANKHS for the compliments and the comment!
I read all of this an I'm a white woman an every bit of this is bullshit. I have a biracial son he's never bn made of because of his color an I'm not fat unintelligent or any other egatibe things,to b thought of. I think it's really sad that who or what black person wrote this is a straight racist an obviously very jealous of the white woman. .which I can really understand why? We (i) don't wear weave, I don't wear fake nails, an I don't have to put my ass in Eva ones face to b noticed. So w that being said let's down grade each other an make it bigger than what it is,cause it's not worth it. No one can control who another person loves
ReplyDeleteI read all of this an I'm a white woman an every bit of this is bullshit. I have a biracial son he's never bn made of because of his color an I'm not fat unintelligent or any other egatibe things,to b thought of. I think it's really sad that who or what black person wrote this is a straight racist an obviously very jealous of the white woman. .which I can really understand why? We (i) don't wear weave, I don't wear fake nails, an I don't have to put my ass in Eva ones face to b noticed. So w that being said let's down grade each other an make it bigger than what it is,cause it's not worth it. No one can control who another person loves
ReplyDeleteAn one other thing ever black man I have been w has used me I can't believe that 1 race is so lazy that they jump from woman to,woman just to have a place to live an whoever thinks that white women are w black men because of there genitals!!!!!. Guess what. Everyone I HAVE BEEN W SHOULD BE A MEMBER OF THE ITTY BITTY DICK COMMITTEE. So believe me pens size has nothing to do w it. If I want something bigger I'll go to my own race ....
ReplyDeleteAn one other thing ever black man I have been w has used me I can't believe that 1 race is so lazy that they jump from woman to,woman just to have a place to live an whoever thinks that white women are w black men because of there genitals!!!!!. Guess what. Everyone I HAVE BEEN W SHOULD BE A MEMBER OF THE ITTY BITTY DICK COMMITTEE. So believe me pens size has nothing to do w it. If I want something bigger I'll go to my own race ....
ReplyDeleteI read all of this an I'm a white woman an every bit of this is bullshit. I have a biracial son he's never bn made of because of his color an I'm not fat unintelligent or any other egatibe things,to b thought of. I think it's really sad that who or what black person wrote this is a straight racist an obviously very jealous of the white woman. .which I can really understand why? We (i) don't wear weave, I don't wear fake nails, an I don't have to put my ass in Eva ones face to b noticed. So w that being said let's down grade each other an make it bigger than what it is,cause it's not worth it. No one can control who another person loves
ReplyDelete'Sandy'...
DeleteMy response to your opinions would probably be a bit too lengthy for this section, so I'm going to dedicate my next post to your comments.
U know exactly what I'm saying is true. Every black I've been in contact w ain't nothing but users an players....lol
ReplyDeleteU know exactly what I'm saying is true. Every black I've been in contact w ain't nothing but users an players....lol
ReplyDelete'Sandy'...
DeleteMy whole point was/is, if you don't like Black men, and you clearly feel superior to us, WHY ARE YOU DATING US?
Go date one of your own kind...if you can.
I thought out of a whole race I could at least meet one. ....NOT. .
ReplyDeleteI thought out of a whole race I could at least meet one. ....NOT. .
ReplyDelete'Sandy'...
DeleteYou still don't get it do you?
I can tell by the things you've said about Black men AND women, that you ALWAYS felt superior to us. And if you didn't feel superior to Black women, you definitely felt superior to Black men.
Meaning, in your heart of hearts, you NEVER WANTED TO DATE A BLACK MAN IN THE FIRST PLACE! You settled for one 'cause for whatever reason, probably your being fat, no white or non-Black man wanted to commit to a relationship with you.
What you should've done, is lose your excess weight so you could be with the white, or non-Black man you truly wanted to be with. But you figured it would be easier to be with one of us.
Problem is, you couldn't hide how you felt about us, around us. So, whichever one of us you were dating, left you 'cause in some way you made them feel like you were just settling for them.
Once again, in your heart of hearts, even though you won't admit it; if you were at your perfect weight and had choices of non-Black men to date, you wouldn't of ever dated one of us.
So stop playing the victim!
Yes you do see white men with fat black women. They have a "Mammy Complex". They were usually raised by black women when their own fucked in the head mothers couldn't be bothered with them. The oedipal urge leads them to imprint on these women instead of their biological mothers. The difference is, society recognizes these men as damaged freaks.
ReplyDeletewhat the fuck! you have totally forgotten to mention that there are still people in this world that want to be in a genuine relationship for the sake of loving one another and enjoying each other's company, and basically doing life together... no MATTER THE COLOR OF THEIR SKIN. I hope all races eventually melt into one so enough of this hatred will be put to an end.
ReplyDelete'Anonymous'...
DeleteMarriages between white and Black people, make up less than 1% of overall american weddings.
Now, I know white people like to SAY they're in favor of inter-ethnic marriages, but your actions, especially in the case of Black people, speak louder than words.
The fantasy of a 'post-racial', or 'post-ethnic' society is just that, a fantasy.
Black racism is no better than white racism. As long as you have people who profit from it like Al Sharpton, the flames will continue to be fanned. ANY generalization about an entire race, gender, or sexual orientation is ridiculous and is rooted in lack of understanding. Who a person chooses to date and/or marry is their business like it or not. God gave them a free will. Only through His Great love can man overcome this hate that exist and festers in the US...that's the cold hard truth!
ReplyDelete'Andy'...
DeleteAsk yourself this question: Who profits most from any kind of 'racism' or bigotry, white people or Black people?
See, I understand you have no vested interest in being truthful about how your people have, and continue to, treat my people.
Cause if you did, you'd have to admit how wickedly your people have acted towards mine. It's easy to talk about God's love when your people aren't the ones being made to suffer.
And that's the COLD HARD TRUTH!!
'Memphis'...
ReplyDeleteI have also seen white men with fat Black women, but those instances have been seldom, and I know for a fact, that those white men tend to be gay.
Also, there's no stereotype of white men dating fat Black women exclusively, but Black men have been stereotyped as only being able to get into relationships with fat white women. Even though this is untrue, that's the stereotype that's been foisted on us by the american status quo.
And with this post, more than anything, I wanted to share my experiences of how I saw fat white women treating Black men on a dating website I belonged to. And I wanted to use this as a cautionary tale of why Black men should avoid these types of white women.
You've got some backwards ass ideas about white women ... and black women for that matter.
ReplyDelete'Nonide'...
DeleteTo me what's most backwards, is a fat white woman dating a Black man who she knows she'd never consider being with, if she were at her perfect weight.
I've known fat white women who clearly feel superior to Black men (and Black women too), that still get into relationships with Black men.
And after they do, they feel short-changed for thinking they settled for being with one of us. And once their words and deeds behind feeling this way, drive that Black man out of their lives, they wanna' play the victim and talk about how there's no good Black men to be with, cause we're ALL players.
So how much sense does that make?
And you obviously haven't read any of my other posts, cause I certainly DON'T feel the same way about Black women.
Dear Mr. Mimia,
ReplyDeleteWow. Since I was a child I always saw all groups of people as humans. All equal and yet so very diverse. I do not favor one group over another. I am one of those fat white woman you have so crudely spoken of and yet I will not trash you as you have trashed those like me. But I will say this, you are wrong. You are wrong to assume that what you say is the standard about fat white woman. A woman, no mater her color, shape or size, is still a woman. The heart inside every woman desires to be loved and treasured. And yes, security is very important to us, however, feeling as though we can only have that security through a white man, is simply not true. There are many men of darker color who have overcome the odds thrown at them and are a force to be recon with, just as is the same for so many others in this world, whatever their color, gender and culture be. And not all fat white woman are so low that they would just give themselves to anyone for sex. Some of us are still vergins and have strong beliefs that have kept us from being booty calls and baby mama's. A woman who is loved and knows it, will give her all. And for a white fat woman to love and marry a skinny black man isn't settling. Not for her and not for him. I don't care about the color of your skin or the size you're in, what matters is the character within. And there are people of all cultures, genders,colors, shapes and sizes who have an ugly character. Let me tell you five reasons a man should look beyond the color and size of a woman.
1. The beauty on the outside will fade through the years as life unfolds and so it is important to marry the woman who can touch your heart and is worth dying for.
2. The entire character of a woman is not known through how she looks on the outside. For it isn't until you truly spend time in her company and are amiable do you learn who she is.
3. Some of the most beautiful spirits are in the bodies of those who are less than perfect.
4. The most beautiful of people are those who see through eyes of love and a woman who is loved is a powerful mate.
5. We each are unique. God created us in His image and we are wonderfully and fearfully made.
Gender, color, size and shape are outward visuals. We all have something or someone we like with reasons and sometimes, there are no reasons. The man I marry, if that is God's will, will be the man I love and who loves me. You see, his color, shape and size won't matter; what will matter is his character, because life will happen. Do I believe I will change your opinion? No, but I do aim to shed light on another opinion. Be well.
Sincerely,
Irene :-)
A woman who does not see herself as a fat white woman, but as a woman God created and a woman God loves.
Irene’…
DeleteI respect your opinion, but being a white woman, fat or otherwise, your breeding won’t allow you to understand several points that are being expressed in this post.
First off, what you’re indulging in, without realizing it, is a paradigm of white intellectualism. Meaning, you’re theorizing on the way things ‘should’ be rather than speaking on the way things really are. Now, you may consider my argument and the language of my argument to be crude and crass, but the difference between you and I is I’m not engaging in any theories, I’ve actually seen this behavior exhibited by fat white women when they’re in the company of Black man over the course of several years. So, I’m not just speaking about something I don’t know.
Secondly, another fact you’re not realizing is, being a white woman, fat or otherwise, you have access to the white privilege, whether you know it or not, or whether you want to admit it or not. Meaning, society has always told white women specifically that you are the epitome of feminine beauty. So you have no idea what a Black woman, or a Black person period goes through as far as being told that we are the least desirable type of person on the planet.
Now, not only does that have serious ramifications on the psyche of Black people, but this results in how we are treated by other ethnic groups. And the overwhelming majority of white women, especially fat ones, treat Black men accordingly, whether they, or you, want to admit it or not.
Now, I wish the world were one utopian melting pot like you describe in your diatribe, but it’s not. It’s more like an ethnic incinerator. And you may not want to admit this, but the majority of your peers don’t think like you. That’s why this is one of my most popular posts, cause it resonates with the reality of what people are really thinking, and how they’re really acting.
Third, this post is not about fat women. It is specifically about fat white women and how they disrespect Black men. Cause whether or not fat white women will admit it, they ultimately feel superior to any Black man they date.
So, I’m not talking about physical attributes here, I’m talking about psychological ones. The issue is not the aesthetic beauty of fat white women, it’s about how they really want to be with a white man who they feel offers them the most security, but how they don’t want to endeavor to lose the weight that would get them closer to that goal. Basically, like so many white people, they wanna’ have their cake and eat it too (pun intended). They want to be afforded the luxury of not having to work out to lose the weight to get themselves a white man, while dating and disrespecting a Black man. And when they show said Black man that they feel they’re just settling for him, when that Black man bolts, the white woman gets to say there’s no good Black men out there.
And again, this is no theory, I see this happening year in and year out.
So I’m hoping you can see this mind-set is not exclusive to fat white women, but to the majority of white people period. So you can hold fast to your illusions of ethnic harmony, ‘cause unfortunately, they don’t wash in this argument, or in the real world at large. Again, pun intended.
'Anonymous'...
ReplyDeleteThere's a couple of points I want to make regarding this comment.
First, before Black men and women start pointing fingers at each other's dysfunction and saying: "What the hell is wrong with y'all?" We have to first consider how white fascists have conditioned us to hate ourselves more than any other kind of person on the planet, cause we have the most genetic power to breed them out of existence...which is happening as I'm writing this. So we need to understand that white fascists have, and still are, throwing everything they can at us, in regards to initiatives that ensure no 'pure-bred' Black man and woman, want anything to do with one another.
Second, when you say Black men are too insecure to deal with an educated Black woman, what you're not realizing is the Black woman's education is not what's turning Black men away from them. It's what white fascists have turned Black women into, that's making us look elsewhere for mates. Meaning, if a Black woman is conditioned to hate all Black men, there's nothing any Black man can do to reverse that. And life is too short to put up with the kind of misery that Black woman is going to put that Black man through. Also, if a Black woman has grown up in a household headed by a single Black mother, who's told her that Black men ain't no damn good ever since she's started walking, then more than likely, this Black woman will revile every Black man she sees. And I can tell you from personal experience, that 8 out of 10 Black women, are conditioned to hate Black men...and they don't know it. So for those Black women, it's check and mate...the game's over for them ever being in a productive and healthy relationship with any Black man.
Conversely, if a Black man grows up being abused by his mother, or if his father has told him how conniving and vindictive Black women are, then more than likely, the thought of being with a Black woman will repulse him. And I can already hear Black women saying: "Well, if more Black men would stay with their children, then these abuses wouldn't happen." But stats are there to prove that more white fathers abandon their children than Black ones. And I'll write a post about that stat soon, cause quiet as it's kept, globally, the woman who produces the most out-of-wedlock births, are the white women of Iceland. But again, more on that later. And if you want to know why the Black 'nuclear' family is in such disarray, you should read my post on christelyn karazin, where I put our familial dysfucntions into a historical context.
Third, when you say: '...most of the women's attitudes would melt if a man stepped up took control and ruled with love, kindness, and smarts...' I'm here to tell you that if a Black woman is being combative, foul-mouthed, disrespectful and extremely offensive to any Black man, it's a downright crime to tell him to stay in a relationship with her. Especially when we consider the fact that Black men have so many other obstacles to face in life. If Black women would comport themselves around Black men, the way they do around white and non-Black men, then we could meet each other half-way at least. And there are books written by Black women, for Black women on 'swirling', that tell them specifically, when you're with a white man you should drop the 'attitude' that you have around Black men.
'Anonymous'(Part 2)...
ReplyDeleteFourth, I suspect you've read my latest post about Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer, and how Odell Beckham completely dismissed Lena as unattractive, to the point where Lena couldn't help but talk about it in a magazine interview. I'm sure she was thinking: How dare any Black man think any white woman is ugly? But that's what happened. So, Black men are being more discerning about the women, especially the white women, they date and mate with.
Lastly, the point of my latest post is too many Black men AND women are letting themselves be used by whites and non-Blacks as sexual handi-wipes for thier pleasure. And the only remedy for that, and all of our other problems, is to rid our minds of the self-hatred(s) that white fascists have bred into us. And hopefully, my Blog is making a contribution towards that effort.
'Colin'...
ReplyDeleteFirst off, if you don't own and/or operate a multi-billion dollar corporation that has the ability to block my people's access to resources, then you're not a 'fascist'. When I use the term 'fascist', I'm not talking about a bigoted, working-class white person. Cause they really are the most clueless people in the world.
Second, the 'jews' you are referring to, are white people (fascists) who practice judaism. Period. Cause judaism is a religion, not an ethnicity.
When whites say jews are behind every repugnant world conspiracy, they're doing this to put the blame on someone else besides themselves. Once again, if you're white, the under-handed manipulators you're referring to (jews) are white fascists. They are white men and women! Cause again, no one's born jewish.
white fascists just want us to believe this jewish/zionist non-sense so they can say the world's most inhumane people are not us, but them. *pointing fingers at white men and women with dark hair and eyes*
So go sell that half-baked deflection/fake-out theory somewhere else, cause we're all stocked up here.
I'm not even sure how I came across this post, as I see it's a few years old. I am white and married to a black man, but I was intrigued by your article. I don't really take offense to your words, in fact some of this I agree with. I recently watched an interview with Dr Umar Ifatunde that my friend posted, and my mind was blown, as it kind of is with this post.
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I are from a very small rural area where everyone farms. we all grew up poor and isolated. Although we all lived the same (financially speaking) there is no denying that there is a difference. But I never knew of ppl like black nationalists, and I would bet neither did the black people to a certain extent. When it came time to find a mate there, almost all of the black people were related so there were a ton of mixed couples out of necessity. Some would go out of town to date but most didn't have the resources for that. That being said, a lot of the white women act crazy and I never knew why. Trying to insert themselves in a culture they know nothing about, other than what they see on TV. It almost became a joke that the white women acted "more black" than the black women. And yes, they would bitch all day long about a black man, but still date them/have kids with them. In that area, no matter how you looked, the good old white boys would not touch you if they thought you may have slept with a black man. Either way, we never caught too much flack for being together. Fast forward (we've been together 9 years) and we move to the city and it's like we are in a different world. We thought it would be more acceptable in a big city north of where we are from. But really my husband is judged a lot by the black people he has met recently. And I get told a lot that I don't seem like the type to be with a black man. I have a very strong southern accent, and I act how I always have, nice to everyone and mild mannered. At the same time, I do not by any means assume to understand the plight of black people, nor do I think I'm enlightened or privileged because I'm with someone that is not white and he is not privileged to be with a person that is. But people are constantly questioning our motives for being together. That is not something we're used to. I can say that even after 9 years, I still make every meal for him and plate it and he still says thank you. We still make each other laugh and know that we are each other's biggest fan. We make the same amount of money generally and are both in relatively good shape. I may not agree with everything you say, or maybe I believe there are plenty exceptions to the rule, but I do see where you are coming from and definitely see the reason for the stereotype.
I don't really know the reason for me commenting, other than I guess to share my story even though you may not care Lol. I hope you haven't taken any of this in a negative connotation, as it definitely wasn't meant to be. Again, I was just very intrigued. Nobody from where we're from really talks like this or about these things, and my husband and I both have been very surprised at the difference in interests and knowledge in the black communities outside of the farms we grew up on. Not necessarily smart vs dumb, and not negative, but just... different. We never thought we would feel more uncomfortable leaving the south! This has been educational, to say the least ��
'Anonymous'...
DeleteThree points I'd like to make:
One, Malcolm X said anyplace below Canada is the south, and he was absolutely right.
Two, you say you're a white woman who's in relatively good shape, but I'd be willing to bet you're overweight. And if you are, I don't think you'd admit it here.
Three, being that I'm pretty sure you're overweight, my question to you is, would you have been with a Black man if you were at your perfect weight? And could you answer this question honestly?
But all in all, your sentiments sound sincere and because of that, I do thank you for commenting.
As a BBWW (Big Bbeautiful White Woman)I can say you have a lot of things twisted. Any man I am with (white, brown, yellow or black) I treat the same, as the kings that they are or the assholes the come of to be. But the bottom line is, I am a good woman, I am a very sexual person with the right partner, but I do not sleep around. I do not prefer a white man, and seek security in one. I seek security in myself. Anything I need I must first be able to find and supply my self. I do not think I or anyone is settling when I am in a relationship with any one. We are both lucky to have found a person we feel a connection with. I think you have taken personal bad experiences and now portray them to all fat white women, which is sad and unfair.
ReplyDelete'Lisa'...
DeleteTwo questions:
If you were currently at your perfect weight, would you be with a Black man?
And, can you answer the above question honestly?