When I was an ardent fan of (Uncle) Tommy Sotomayor's, I'd always hear rumblings about this guy named David Carroll; and how he too was an advocate for Black men.
So one day I decided to check out his YouTube channel.
What I initially heard were his rants about black women and how they were so deleterious to a Black man's life and state of well being.
He'd wax philosophic about how Black men should avoid black women at all costs, and he told numerous tales of how he counseled younger Black men on these exact points.
But then I experienced a bout of deja vu; in that, David began talking disparagingly about Black people on the whole...just like Uncle Tommy Sotomayor does.
Firstly, David would start his rants by toking on a large cigar...which is nothing but a facsimile of a Black phallus.
If David were a deep thinker, like he fancies himself to be, he'd know that white men smoke cigars because consciously or subconsciously, they know that a Black man's penis has the genetic power to literally breed them out of existence.
And they smoke these Black phallus' to look powerful..or at least as genetically powerful as Black men.
Coincidentally, this is where the stereotype of Black men having bigger penises comes from; it has nothing to do with physical size, this stereotype is making reference to a Black man's genetic power to create every other kind of man, while none of them can create one of him.
*Side Note: For any Black christians out there, the concept of mary's 'immaculate conception' is actually making reference to Black people as well. Beyond the fact that mary's miraculous virgin birth was just a fable, the 'real' immaculate conception in ancient Africa was the birth of a healthy Black baby.
Because no other person on the planet could produce a Black baby except for a Black man and woman. Once again, this speaks to our power to create every other kind of person while none of them can create one of us.
But back to David...when I'd watch one of his videos, after he puffed on his insipid cigar, I'd hear him say things like: "Black people don't have the capacity to think critically..."
And from there, he'd expound on that point.
Also, anyone who see his vids will notice how he has a vinyl album of a Martin Luther King jr. speech hung upside down.
In my header's triptych, you'll also see the last picture of Dave has that record AND one of Obama's campaign signs hanging upside down.
This is suppose to show how much he despises ignorant Black people, but what it's really showing is how he feels emotionally wrong, or how internally, he feels his world's been turned upside down for being born Black.
In one other instance, someone commented on his YouTube channel, that he must despise himself for being Black if he's got such a low opinion of Black people. To which he replied: "Who said I was Black?"
After about a week, I stopped my visits to his channel.
At one time, I held a bit of animosity for him and people like Uncle Tommy Sotomayor; but now, I feel sorry for them.
Because it must suck to want to be white so badly, knowing you never will be.
People like Dave and Tom will never realize the blessing it is to have been born a Black man.
Again, any Black man who doesn't recognize that he's got the power to create every other type of man, while none of them can create him, is doing himself a grave disservice.
Black men should be honored to have been born into the majestic, regal and powerful body of a Black man. And this is not hyperbole; consciously or subconsciously, white supremacists know how powerful we are, that's why they've declared an outright war against us.
But all Tommy and Dave can see are the 'cons' of being born a Black man. They've forsaken the rose for its thorns.
And what really kills me about Tom and Dave is they'll swear up and down that they're advocates for Black men. These guys feel they have all the answers for the Black diaspora and every Black person should heed their message.
One thing I've recognized though that I didn't before, is Tommy and Dave genuinely don't know how much they hate themselves for being Black.
Several years ago, I knew an attractive Black woman who would exclaim to me: "I don't know why I don't have a man...even the ugly women have men, so why don't I?"
Problem was, she had no idea how much she was conditioned to hate Black men.
I'd seen her get into relationships with Black men she genuinely liked, and after a couple of weeks, she'd tell them some of the most insulting things in the world; and they'd eventually leave. And she genuinely had no idea she was doing this.
I liken this to what Tommy and Dave are doing.
When people tell them they're self-hating Black men, they look at these people like they're crazy; because again, they genuinely can't see what they're doing.
This is what I mean when I say the real battlefield is the subconscious mind. 'Cause that's where Black people have to go to recondition themselves out of this self-hatred.
This is work people. There's no shortcuts to this and there's no easy fix for this.
Mind you, we've spent nearly 18 years in this country's school system learning to hate ourselves; that's not gonna' be resolved overnight.
And I'm including myself in this too.
I've taken on a meditative regimen to recondition myself out of my own prejudices against my people. So I'm not just pointing fingers.
But, if you invest the time to do this, your life will be so much more fulfilling; you'll never again have that deep internal sense of feeling like your wrong in this world. And you'll experience a whole new self-attractiveness that you hadn't before; also, you'll see your people for what they are...and that's the most attractive people on this earth.
So for all of you who are still stuck on Uncle Tommy's and Dave's self-hating messages, you need to look deeper into yourself and ask why you're a fan of these Black men who clearly wish they were white.
Then you could truly see them for what they are; miserable, self-loathing men who are hurriedly on a path to one place...