Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Seal, Heidi Klum and the specter of doomed marriages...


Recently, I viewed Seal performing his song 'Whirlpool' on YouTube.

Now, between Seal's melancholic delivery of the song's lyrics and the lovely rhythms of the acoustic guitar on this track, this song is nothing short of mesmerizing. 

Then I realized, I've always been interested in Seal's backstory, but I've never run across any articles that dealt with it in a really in depth way. 

Beyond all the hype about his breakup with Heidi Klum, I wanted to know more about him...and I wanted to know why his marriage failed. So I endeavored to find out. 

And here's what I found...   

Seal Henry Olusegun Olumide Adeola Samuel was born in Nigeria on February 19th, 1963. One of Seal's names, Olusegun means 'God is victorious' in the Yoruba language.

His parents, a Nigerian mother and Brazilian father, Adebisi and Francis Samuel, expatriated to London, England shortly after he was born. 

They gave Seal up for adoption when he was months old and Seal grew up in a foster home in Westminster, a bustling London city. 

*Side Note: The distinctive scars on Seal's face come from the auto-immune disease Lupus, and the strain Seal is afflicted with is known for affecting the skin above the neck. 

At the age of four, Seal's mother re-claimed him for two years, but took ill and had to return to Nigeria. Seal then went to live with his father; and for the next several years, Seal endured his wrath. While talking to a journalist, Seal once described his father as: "...an embittered man of lost opportunity." Seal also said of his father: "...unfortunately for him, he was brought up by a strict disciplinarian, in a different culture..."

This lead to Seal leaving home at the age of 15.  

He recounts the years after leaving home as ones where he slept on subways and did anything he could to survive.

He told a reporter of a certain subway line he favored; saying that after the subway's workers cleaned the tracks and platform, he'd seek refuge in a certain alcove besides the tracks where it was warm.  

Seal temporarily dropped out of high school, but re-entered a short time later and went on to earn an associates degree in architecture. 

After his school career, Seal worked a succession of odd jobs, which included: a stint at McDonalds, posting flyers for call girls in London's red box telephone booths, working as an electrical engineer and designing leather clothes. 

While doing this, he began singing regularly in bars and clubs; this led to him securing a lead singers position in a funk band called 'Push'. Eventually, he toured japan with this group in the mid-80's.   

While in asia, Seal joined a blues band in Thailand. Shortly thereafter, he traversed through india on his own. 

In 1990, Seal contributed lyrics and vocals to the song 'Killer', produced by a musically collaborative friend of his, 'Adamski'.  

After securing a production deal, Seal began putting together tracks for what would become his debut album 'Seal'. 

In 1991, Seal released his first single 'Crazy' from his album, and the song was an instant hit. Beyond the hypnotic musical swells and pulse of the track, I think what intrigued people most was the song's chorus: "But we're never gonna' survive unless, we are a little crazy."

It not only spoke to what Seal had been through personally, but it captured the socio-political zeitgeist, in that, every global citizen was seeing the sham of world governments and their institutions. 

It also spoke to the fact that no one's coming to save us but ourselves.

The single 'Crazy' was followed up by the songs 'Future Love Paradise', 'The Beginning' and 'Violet'. Seal's debut album went on to sell a million copies in the UK, and 3.5 million worldwide. 

But adjusting to his new found success was hard for Seal; during this time, Seal was involved in a nearly life-threatening car crash, he had a double pneumonia, and in another bout of bad luck, a person was shot right next to him while he walked on Sunset Boulevard in Hollywood, California. 

He came away from all these incidents unscathed enough to record his next and most successful album, the eponymously titled 'Seal'.  

This album included hits like, 'Prayer For The dying', 'Don't Cry', 'Newborn Friend' and the inimitable 'Kiss From A Rose'. 

The song 'Kiss From A Rose' would prove to be the greatest selling single of his career; and the fact that it was featured on the movie soundtrack 'Batman Forever' helped promote the album. The song also won Seal three grammys in 1996. And quite frankly, Seal's song was ten times better than the Batman movie it was promoting.

The grammy awards Seal won were in the categories of 'Best Male Pop Vocal', 'Best Song Of The Year' and 'Best Record Of The Year'. 'Kiss From A Rose' remained at the number 1 position on the U.S. Billboard charts for 12 weeks. 

But even these accolades couldn't quell the disquietude that stirred in Seal's soul. 

All those years of abuses suffered at the hands of his father and his early years of abandonment came to a head in his next album 'Human Being'.  

Seal released this album in 1998 after dealing with problems with his record label and his producer Trevor Horn. The first single 'Human Beings' was inspired by the death of Tupac Shakur and Biggie Smalls, as well as Seal's thoughts on death, self-esteem and fame.


But what really inspired this LP was displayed on its cover...and that was Seal's consummate self-loathing. 

I suspect this is how Seal's father made him feel all those years he lived under his rule. Seal's pose almost makes him look like he's cringing while waiting for another one of his father's blows. 

It speaks to a body dysmorphia that probably had Seal feeling almost other-wordly and alien-like, even in the midst of fame. It also looks like he's suffering from an almost 'Kafka-esque' mind-state at the thought of his facial and physical features. 

And this internal strife would cause him to make poor choices in relationships. 

Enter Heidi Klum...  

Now, for those who don't know, Heidi Klum is a german-american model who's been half naked on the cover of Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issues; and she's credited for being a fashion designer, actress and television producer. 

Since germans are known for their loose morals, it figures that Heidi wouldn't be an exception. But let's delve deeper into how she and Seal first met. 

Seal and Heidi's first meeting was in 2003 at the 'GQ' awards in London; but weeks later, they stayed in the same hotel. And Heidi stated that she saw Seal in 'biker shorts' after he'd just come from a gym. 

She said she was immediately impressed with his 'package' and promptly introduced herself. Mind you, Heidi was pregnant with her ex's child at the time. 

This tells you everything you need to know about Heidi. 

Now, even though Heidi exposed herself as a super skank, what happened next is what really sealed their fate...no pun intended.  

As Seal told a journalist, about a month into their courtship, Heidi told him she was pregnant with her ex's child. 

Actually, Seal put it like this; after Heidi told him she was expecting a baby, Seal laughed and said, "Already? That's amazing."

This implied they had sex several times before. 

Heidi replied, "Not with you stupid."

Seal said there was an awkward silence after that; then he replied, "It doesn't change the way I feel about you, 'cause the fact that you're here tells me you think a lot about me."

This is the moment Seal went from being a singing superstar to an outright simp. And unbeknownst to him, it was gonna' be all downhill from there.

Now, a lot of people are under the impression that Heidi settled for Seal, when actually, it was Seal who settled. 

The moment this tramp told him she was pregnant, Seal should have replied with some sort of pleasantry and slowly phased this skank out of his life. Seal could've had any woman he wanted, instead, because of his feelings of self-loathing, he wound up being another simp tethered to another skank.

This was also when they got visited by what I call, the 'specter of doomed marriages'. 

You see, the reason simps and skanks get along so well is they're both from unstable and abusive households; and it's damn near impossible for them to get out of that frame of mind.

Unfortunately, neither one of them realize this and they're doomed to be in bad relationships for the rest of their lives. 

That is, unless they can diagnose the problem in their subconscious and work to recondition themselves out of it. 

And most people don't even recognize the problem at that level. 

So the question simps, skanks and everyone else has to ask themselves before entering a relationship is: do I know who I'm attracting and who I'm attracted to? 

And it's a fact that if you come from an unstable and abusive household, you're gonna' be attracting and attracted to, people from unstable and abusive households. 

AND THERE'S NO EXCEPTION TO THIS RULE. 

NONE.

Problem is, most people never get to the point of asking  themselves this question. 

So, in all of this, I hope Seal learned a lesson from his mistake. 

Unfortunately, he'll be tied to this tramp for the rest of his life. 

Heidi actually started an affair with her bodyguard before she and Seal officially split. 

But I think Seal is smart enough to have learned one maxim I overheard from a wise man. And that is...

When you lose, don't lose the lesson. 

And after a painful loss like this, I think Seal definitely learned his. 

At least I hope he has.

Ma'at Hotep,

MontUHURU Mimia

4 comments:

  1. I see Seal with a black woman. I am a fan of Seal also, but he will find love again. I am not a fan of Heidi Klum, because you are having sex with the bodyguard. Before you are getting a divorce is the whore move. All I can say for Seal. Success is the best revenge, keep making #1 albums. Great Blog.

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    1. HI Patsy...

      I know Seal will find love again...but what kind of love will he find?

      If Seal doesn't resolve the traumas of his childhood with some kind of meditative regimen, he'll date or marry another person just like Heidi...or possibly someone worse.

      I, like you, think Seal is exceptionally talented; but that doesn't resolve what he'll be going through in his relationships. And because of his father, he'll potentially be in bad relationships for the rest of his life.

      So I'm hoping he does the work he needs to do to find that perfect woman.

      And I truly hope he learns from his mistake with Heidi.

      But I'm also sure he'll effortlessly continue to make quality music, 'cause that's what he's best at.

      I'm glad you like this post and again, thanks for commenting.

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  2. Another good black man gone down the drain. I feel these white folks typically do more harm than good in just about any area of a black person's life. If they are white doctors they constantly give us medicine that ultimately leads to cancer. If they are psychologists, they are diligently looking for ways for the black woman to leave the black man or child neglect. If it's a white psychiatrist, they simply think we all need to be drugged up. If it's a white pastor, he wants us to always come, invite others and spend half his time talking about money, yet the church can't help us with anything. If it's a white friend, they want to constantly know what we got going on and how we treat our black man, how to cook-this ultimately leads them taking your black man. If you are married to a white man or white woman they will hound you to make more and more and more money for them. Then, get crazy when you're short on cash.

    I use to have a lot of white friends and even was close to a white dude for a while. After many years of being immersed in an all white neighborhood, church, school, etc, I found it to be quite tiresome. I've given, volunteered, and done more for my white counterparts than any other race. I once tried to get a balance and opened myself to help and assist the local Brazilian community and Spanish folks. Now, I realize that I still have not accomplished anything for my people. This feels sad to me. I don't know what to do at this point in my life for my people because I feel that I need a whole lot of money to build up the economic wealth of blacks. I wish some of these rich and famous football and basketball players would do more to lift up and build up the economic base of the Black community. I wish.

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    Replies
    1. 'Veronica'...

      The absolute best thing you can do is see how our Diaspora has been conditioned to hate themselves by white fascists, and recondition yourself out of your own Black self-hatred, if you indeed have any.

      Hell, if our Diaspora can just recognize what's been done to us by white fascists, we could see ourselves and each other differently enough to heal the rift between us. And after that, we can unite to accomplish anything.

      So it all starts with YOU changing your own mind.

      All the rest will follow.

      Thanks for commenting!

      Delete